Dr. Debra Laino

Board certified sex therapist Dr. Debra Laino, has in her career come across almost every imaginable sex malady, yet still contends that in order to find that bastion of satisfaction; you must live life to its fullest. In an interview with Times Square Gossip with Laino, she said that most frustration comes when a relationship hits a road block.

“It’s no secret that after being together for a while the sizzle fizzles! The heat of any new relationship is a chemical reaction: A glorious concoction of neurochemicals and hormones. You can spend lots of money on therapy, relationship books, intimacy workshops and more but why not just try the simple things first. After all, often times in life it is the simple things that matter the most. “

Here are the top five: The first one is simple: Breaking Routines:

Though it is nice and comfortable to have routines as a matter of fact some routines are key to an affectionate and healthy relationship. However, routines become redundant and boring. I advise couples to do things together to break the daily/weekly routine. For example, every Saturday night do you go to the same place to eat? Change it. Have a romantic dinner in house or try another style cuisine. 

The second one is even simpler: Kiss Each Other At Least Three Times A Day:

Often in long-term relationships we forget to kiss our partner. We really forget to kiss each other passionately. That passionate kiss often turns into the peck on the cheek. These kisses need to be passionate (open mouth and longer). Kissing can become routine so it is important to make an effort to change it up. In addition, make sure the two of you are embracing while you are kissing for a release of your bonding chemical oxytocin.

The third will not only make your partner feel good but it will make you feel good: Say At Least Three Nice Things To Each Other Each Day:

Often we take our partner for granted and someone else comes along and makes them feel worthy and cared for again. This often happens because someone else acknowledges their existence by complimenting them. Yes, it happens that easy it just takes a little time of that same person doing it.. So make sure that you are reminding your partner that you do acknowledge them every day. 

The Fourth Is About You: Success Is In Your Dress:

Are you wearing an old ratty pajama set to bed? A pair of sweats with holes in the crotch? A penguin nightly? Get for real! You need to re-think your appearance. You wouldn't have done that on your first night together why are you doing it now? This is really about self-respect and self-esteem. We all work hard and we all want to be comfortable sleeping but there are things that are comfortable that look attractive too. 

The Fifth Is Not A Myth: Better Sex Is About Enjoying The Act:

You do not need to act like a porn star or look like one either. It is important to actually let your partner know that you enjoy having sex with them. Tell them how wonderful it is (don’t overdo it!). Allow yourself to actually feel pleasure do not just pretend – If you do you are short sighting your partner and yourself. One of the best love-making behaviors is to actually learn how to feel pleasure and to gift your partner with your pleasure. If you do not feel pleasure during sex it is your responsibility to start learning what does bring you erotic pleasure so you can translate it into sexual experiences.

Photo Courtesy Of: Dr. Debra Laino