James Edstrom

As I write this, I just really hate the world. Going to a party tonight for Parco P.I. at the strip club Headquarters, I guess I admitted how much I hate my life. I really do. After almost 30 years of photographing celebrities, I just hate it all. There are many fond memories of the past, but I just guess I have turned into a old complaining F**K... I turned into that old man we used to see on TV, bitching, upset about everything and mad at the world. I am that old man who says, things were better in the old days. But the reality is they were, and I am only 50. I really hate just about it all. The only thing that keeps me going is my family, friends and the homeless kid I am trying to repair from so many years of abuse from his adoptive parents. He is like my son. He has so much to learn. He has given me so much in my life. He has given so much and hopefully I am giving him the tools to live a good life. Hopefully when I drop dead from hating the world, I have changed his life. A gay guy, raising a straight kid. A real soap opera. A real reality show. I hope I can do it. I try to create memories, great memories for him. Not the bad ones he has. Good ones. But it is so hard. Really hard.

The Kids Story:

My kid, my son was taken away from his mother when he was around two. He was in foster care till nine years old, along with his brothers and sisters. They were all adopted when they were around nine by the same family. They made them slaves on a farm in Penn. They refused to send them to school and told the state they were being home schooled. I have heard stories of molestation and such horrible s**t, it is almost un-printable. My real friends help. They know he is very important in my life and they are there for him. One of my friends gave him his first birthday party ever. The smiles on his face and the amazement were worth a million celebrities and a million bucks. . He never knew this. He never knew a birthday or if anyone cared. He never had a present on his birthday, never had a Christmas, a Easter or anything. The past year he had it all. He knew I got presents for Christmas, and wanted them before like every kid does. I told him he had to wait for Santa. When Easter came, I colored eggs with him and told him the Easter Bunny would hide them. He said there was no Easter Bunny, but I told him there was and he would get a buck a egg that he found. He laughed like he could find them all, but there was one he couldn't and I laughed. But I paid him off anyway. It was all worth it to see the smiles on his face. His tooth fell out, or part of a filling. I told him to put it under his pillow and the Tooth Ferry would leave him money. He really laughed at this, but he did it anyway and the Tooth Ferry left him ten bucks. He said it was just a filling, but I told him it must have been the filling ferry. I believe it was.


What is wrong with everyone in this world these days. No ones cares. I have many celebrity friends, and I adore them all. Along with the kid, they keep me going, otherwise I would end it all in the middle of Times Square, because that's where I would get the most publicity. I'm not stupid. If I end it all, I have to get the most publicity out of it. I can see the headlines. Un-happy paparazzi and Times Square Gossip editor James Edstrom has his last ball in Times Square. It's perfect. But I have my kid. I have my kid who I have to repair. I have to show him whats right and whats wrong. I have to teach him and I have to show him how the world works. Then I can go. I'm happy too. Bye..... No one in this city or business keeps their word anymore. In the old days, you word was your contract. Now double crossing is the norm. I have to fight for every dime that I agreed to with a magazine or person. I fight with everyone except my friends. Sometime I do fight with my friends because they say I'm fighting too much. I am so tired of going into McDonalds for a cup of coffee and waiting 15 minuets for a cup of coffee because they do not know service, and there is no one on line. I go into Burger King yesterday at my friends request, to order ribs and they are burnt to a crisp and the manager thinks I'm nuts when I show them the burnt ribs and they cost over 8 bucks. I fight... I'm tired of the MTA asking for more money when they can not understand that everyone is going threw the back doors on the buses and not paying the fares, so they can't make money. One woman last week who was old, went threw the back door, sat in the back seat without paying the fare, pulled out a bottle of Whisky and told the guy next to her that she never pays. Another time a woman was pushing a wheel chair down 57th street and when she saw the bus coming she sat in it. She never paid a fare. Why is this? Why do all the handicapped people who we spend millions of dollars on to make the transit handicapped accessible, not get asked to pay a fare. They are supposed too, they never do. When I said something to the bus driver, they act like I was a nuisance and I was wicked to ask a handicapped person to pay the fare. They do nothing.... This BX12 route has ten to twenty people walking threw the back door at every stop. Add it up. Then there is the oil spill in the Gulf. One company already collected around 400 million in insurance and now they are asking the courts to limit their liability to around 24 million. Hell yeah, destroy every ones living and not only stiff the people, make a profit and destroy the world. Exxon never paid their court judgement for their oil spill years ago. The people lost everything. The rich get richer. Wall street, the crooks got away with it all. I got a credit score of almost 800. I paid for the Bank Of Americas crooked deals and everyone else on wall street. It's all a show in Congress. We are questioning them. Yet with my high credit score, my rates are raised from them all. I pay for the crooks. I pay for the bad loans that they knew were bad. We all pay and we say nothing. What happened to honest people. What happened to hard workers. If every country cut us off, we would have nothing We can not produce cars without other countries, food or any other goods. What happened to our American way of life? It is dead. So I hate the world. I hate it all. I hate all the lies, I hate all the crooks and I hate the people that refuse to speak up. But I go on. I go on to yell and scream. I scream at the supermarkets, the fast food places and the oil companies. I scream, I yell and everyone thinks I'm nuts. I yell at the middle class getting poor and the poor getting poorer and the rich getting richer. They pull out of the stock market knowing it will go down and they jump right back in when it does and they all make a profit. Yet we all feed them. They live off us. They don't care and you don't either because you keep going back for more. So I bitch. I whine and complain about how good the old days were. I yell about how the corporations get away with everything, I yell about the crooks, I yell at everything. I hate it all, and you should too, but when will you speak up?


It's now or never my friends. The world is falling apart. It will not be a war against black and white, it will be a war against the rich and poor. Speak up now. Health care is a must for every American. Illegal immigration is destroying the country. Fixing illegal immigration will fix health care because they slam our medical systems. They take our jobs no matter what they tell you. Stop the trade agreements, because they favor the other countries not ours. Buy American, the job you save may be yours. Do not let the oil companies get away with oil spills and destroying the American way of life. Yell and scream like I do every day. YELL YELL YELL. Yell about bad service, yell about the oil companies, yell about everything. Yell!


Anonymous said…
This is very well written. You have my exact sentiments!
April Sandmeyer said…
I keep my word.